How To Build a Stronger Ego

In self-help literature, we often read about the benefits of diminishing or eliminating the ego. Many write as though the ideal existence involves giving away all their stuff and doing away with attachment to anything. If that’s truly your calling, then go for it!

But what if you want to just be a regular person and feel good about yourself? What if you want to have a rich and exciting life, whether or not you have material abundance? Is there a way?

Instead of associating ego with detrimental personal traits, you could associate a strong ego with strong character. With a developed ego, you learn to have a healthy sense of self. And a healthy sense of self helps you be a person of character.

You can also work this in reverse: act like a person of character and you’ll learn to have a healthy sense of self. In other words, you’ll develop your ego.

What Is Character?

How do you act like a person of character? Here are some attributes to start with. Maybe you can think of some more that you’d like to demonstrate in your everyday life.

  • Courage: The ability to move forward when uncertain or fearful. This gives you a lot more options than you have when you feel too timid or fearful to take action.
  • Charity: When you help others, you help yourself even more in the end.
  • Discipline: Asserting control over yourself and your daily habits will strengthen your ego.
  • Adventure: Explore the world and its abundance of offerings. By having a better understanding of the world, you’ll understand yourself and others better.
  • Honesty: People who act or speak dishonestly often do so because they’re trying to hide the truth about themselves. Be honest and upfront in all your dealings. 

Expanding Your Mind Strengthens Your Ego

In addition to practicing good character, expanding your mind contributes to a happy and full life, strengthens your ego, and gives you more opportunities to demonstrate your character.

Consider these ways to use your mind for your benefit:

  1. Evaluate your model of the world. How do you act in response to your model of the world? Can you reshape your actions to bring about more desired results?
  2. Create a social support system that best serves you. Humans are social animals. Our interpersonal interactions and our environment have a significant impact on us. Fortunately, to some extent we all get to choose those around us. Include people in your life that support your highest vision of yourself.
  3. Become more capable. The mind can take us all sorts of places, whether we want to go there or not. Ultimately, though, we can choose where we want to direct our mind. Use your innate intelligence to tell your mind where to direct attention. Choose your focus wisely and you can strengthen your character and lessen your fears.

While it is not possible to eliminate your ego, you can  strengthen your ego to have a more engaging life. By building your character and your intellect, you’ll be able to bravely push forward and create the life you and your loved ones deserve.

Co-Worker Relationships That Work

Unless you’re living in a cave, you’ll probably work with other people at some point in your life. Workplace interactions can be interesting and enjoyable. Or they can be disappointing and frustrating. Your experience of them is entirely up to you.

Practicing particular behaviors and applying certain techniques in the workplace will help you manage work relationships successfully. Read on to discover the tenets of colleague relationships that work.

1. Strive to love your work. Make a conscious decision every morning to love what you do. Whether you’re a customer service representative, IT technician or a small business owner, learn to love your work. Your associates will notice you have a true passion for what you do, and they’ll develop great respect for you.

2. Vow to be optimistic when discussing work situations with your colleagues. You’ve probably worked with a negative co-worker in the past and seen the impact of such attitudes. Rather than allow yourself to be pulled down into negativity, keep your positivity high. If you’re consistently optimistic, your colleagues will follow suit.

3. Set a motivating example for your co-workers. Show interest in work projects. Ask questions. Demonstrate a strong work ethic.

4. Be proactive in addressing any difficult issues with your associates. Work in conjunction with them to solve any troublesome situations early in their development.

5. Step up to meet work challenges. Show confidence that your colleagues will do the same. It never hurts to have a “we’re all in this together” attitude at work.

6. Negotiate work differences cheerfully and honestly. Speak from your genuine feelings and use tact in your communication. Those you work with will see your honesty, recognize your integrity, and strive to interact with you the same way.

7. Keep it “short and sweet.” If you’re succinct and clear in your questions and responses, your co-workers will appreciate your efficiency.

8. Listen intently when someone is talking to you. Training yourself to be a good listener is integral to effective relationships, whether at home or work. Avoid interrupting others at all costs. Recognizing your co-workers’ feelings is an important step to strengthening your relationships.

9. Although you may be extremely motivated, allow other co-workers to shine, too. Give credit where credit is due. Compliment your colleagues openly within earshot of others. Remind yourself that praising them doesn’t threaten your work persona in any way. In fact, positivity about others only enhances how people see you.

10. Avoid joining in with co-workers who show negativity. There’s no benefit to anyone if you engage in negative comments or give credibility to such discussions. Spend your precious time elsewhere!

11. Learn to let go of past hurts and struggles with your associates. No real accomplishments can be achieved through holding onto old baggage. Letting go will bring you great relief. Plus, your relationships with those individuals will be on the road to recovery when you decide to let go.

12. Be supportive of others. Demonstrate true interest and involvement in what they’re doing. Keep in mind that everyone thirsts for recognition. Being supportive shows you care about your co-workers and enhances your relationships.

Having work relationships that actually work is within your reach. Apply the above strategies to establish and maintain positive relationships with your fellow workers. Developing effective co-worker relationships leads you down the path to true personal and professional growth.

Beating the Odds: How to Have a Happy and Healthy Marriage

Happy MarriageHaving a happy and healthy marriage is not as hard as it may seem. It actually builds a strong and healthy family as well. It takes work to help it grow but it is worth it!

Yes, maybe the statistics aren’t that good when you look at them but this means to just take precautions and act in targeted ways to ensure you get it right the first time. Sticktuitiveness from both parties and communication are key. Making a decision to not walk away is very important – quitting is not an option – feeling like you want to at times is normal.

Here are my tips:

  • Deal with everything lovingly: in the best relationships – conflict does arise.
  • The goal is not to avoid conflicts at all costs, but to develop ways to deal with them in a healthy way.
  • You don’t always have to be right or have the last word.
  • Listen to what your partner is saying even if it isn’t what you want to hear.
  • Don’t blame each other, it doesn’t matter who is at fault.
  • Be open and honest about your thoughts and feelings.
  • Making Decisions: a marriage is full of decisions small and large. Choosing a place to live, a budget and so much more. All decisions require good communication skills on both parts.
  • It takes two to make a decision.
  • Understand why your partner wants to make a certain decision.
  • Don’t react harshly. Take your time deciding.
  • Look for outside support from friends and family, if needed.

Remember:

People are always changing and growing. You will need to stay in a open and understanding point of view in order to embrace changes that you do not prefer. Communicate about the changes. Accept that plans can change at times. Don’t hold a person back because you are afraid or uncomfortable with change. Stay positive. Discuss any feeling you may have with your loved one. Problems arise but they do not mean that you have to question your relationship because of them.

Most importantly SHOW LOVE. Find out what makes your spouse feel loved. Sometimes it is little or big gifts, sometimes it is a touch or a non-sexual caress for no reason at all, sometimes it is simply being near, sometimes it is words of affirmation, sometimes it is helping with chores, the list goes on. Really practice and you will be glad you did! No kidding – you will be so glad you did!

Building Strong Relationships

Strong relationshipsInvesting time and emotions in a relationship that ends up failing can be exhausting. At work or in your personal life the affects are the same. Time and energy are spent and heartache happens.

Relationships are part of being in a community. Being judged for relationships that we are involved in or that surround us is part of being in that important community. Should we step out of the community and give up on relationships altogether to avoid further pain? Of course not.

Good working relationships are a part of everyday business and your personal life. You want relationships in your life at least for networking and of course for fun. Relationships can vary, there are: family, managers, mentors, lovers, neighbors, acquaintances, employees, and many others in your life.

Here are a few tips to building strong relationships of all types:

Honesty – Be open and transparent. People appreciate it. It may seem risky but being real is the foundation of it all.

Apologies – If you are wrong – admit it. People respect that. Don’t be afraid to admit your mistakes – it only makes you look ridiculous. We are all human.

Communication – Keep in touch so that you are not out of touch. Be available – it is worth it.

Face time – Face-to-face visiting can never be replaced by anything other just that. Spend time together – the quality cannot be surpassed.

Old-fashioned writing vs. emails –  Don’t forget this format – you will be glad you didn’t. Emails are a wonderful way to say hello as well.

Compliment – Let people know you appreciate them and notice what they do – it will take the both of you a long way.

Interest – Really and genuinely care about the person you are in a relationship – do this by taking a keen interest in what they do, like, and enjoy.

Relationships are a wonderful part of life that you do not want to miss out on. Spend time doing a little research and exploration in how you can live out this part of your life – a little fuller – and you will be glad you did. The application of what you have learned is the fun part.