10 Easy Ways to Build Self-Confidence

You probably know someone who just exudes confidence. You might even have wondered, “What’s his secret? How can he be so positive about himself?”

The good news is that you, too, could be that confident. Yes, you could be the one that everyone envies and wonders about!

Surprisingly, self-confidence comes not from some inner gift, but from the things you do. For many, those actions occur naturally or have become ingrained in them. Because such people have done these things a lot in the past, they habitually do them now. By practicing these same actions, you’ll be taking the steps necessary to build your own self-confidence.

Use these strategies to become more self-assured:

  1. Take care with your appearance. How you feel about yourself is reflected in your appearance. Ensure your hair is styled and your clothes are well-fitting when you go out. When you know you look great, you feel great about yourself as well.
  2. Smile and look people in the eye. When you smile and make eye contact, it shows that you have a certain ease about you. People see this and respond positively toward you, giving you a lift as well!
  3. Give genuine compliments to others. Complimenting others shows that you feel good enough about yourself to give positive feedback to others.
  4. Know your strengths. Focus on doing whatever you’re best at. You’ll feel like an expert and know without a doubt that you excel in that area.
  5. Accept your imperfections. Letting go of the need to be perfect means you’re comfortable enough with yourself to admit your imperfections. After all, we all have them. Imperfections only show that you’re human – not that you’re flawed!
  6. Be prepared. Practicing this motto isn’t only for Boy Scouts. Preparedness will show you that you can be successful at whatever you set out to do. Being prepared increases confidence because you know what you’re doing. You’ve practiced in advance to perform whatever needs to be done.
  7. Have goals and work to achieve them. When your life has direction, you know where you’re going. You’ll be consistently working toward accomplishing your aspirations. Because you have goals, you’ll see the progress you’re making, and you’ll feel certain you’ll eventually accomplish them.
  8. Embrace whatever it is you love. Making time to do what you love makes you happy, content, and excited about your own life. It also makes you feel more in control of your life, which adds to your self-confidence.
  9. Excel at work. No matter what kind of work you do, you can strive to be the best at it. Developing a reputation at work as the “go to” person who can always get the job done is a fabulous confidence-builder.
  10. Forget about your ego. When you give up the need to prove something, you’ll be free of feeling compelled to put on airs and impress people. Instead, you’ll become more authentic and real with yourself. Prove to yourself instead of to others that you’re competent and confident and others will see it anyway.

Building your self-confidence takes time, focus and effort. However, your faith in yourself will grow with every small step you take. Start today and begin living as the person you always dreamed you’d be.

Live With Confidence Using To-Do Lists

As a new year approaches, you’re likely reflecting on how to live a better life. Whether you seek convenience, effectiveness, or success with goals, consider using To-Do lists. Even if you have a great memory, your mind can always use a little help holding onto everything you need to do.

If you use To-Do lists, you’ll feel confident that nothing will fall through the cracks. Also, not trying to recall every single thing will help reduce your stress.

Putting things down on paper means you don’t have to expend your precious energy trying to recall scads of small details and tasks to do. Instead, you can confidently accomplish projects and daily goals with minimal effort. This way, you save your energy for the big things, the ones that really matter.

Over time, as you use To-Do lists for daily accomplishments, you’ll notice a boost in your confidence. It makes sense that if you achieve more in a day, you’ll feel better about yourself.

Try this simple, effective system:

  1. Buy a spiral notebook. Write “To-Do List” on the front of it in big letters. Utilize this notebook only for this purpose.
    • Get the size of notebook that will be most convenient for you. If you like a full size 8 ½ x 11 inch notebook, go for it! If you prefer one that fits in a purse, that’s good, too.
  2. Make a commitment to yourself. Always use your notebook as your To-Do list. Avoid writing your lists on scraps of paper here and there. Put your name on the notebook.
    • Your To-Do list is your key to experiencing more success in everything you do. Nothing builds confidence like knowing you’ll eventually achieve every single goal. All you’ve got to do is write down tasks to be completed and goals to be met. Then do them!
  3. Start using your To-Do list today. Open the notebook and on the first page, start listing all the tasks you want to complete. Don’t worry about big projects versus small tasks. It doesn’t matter how many pages it takes to think of every project/task/errand you want to finish.
  4. Celebrate completing tasks. When you finish a task, cross it off the list.
    • As you learn to depend on your To-Do list, you’ll find you worry less about whether you’ll complete tasks. Your confidence will grow as you learn that when it’s on the list, it’ll get done. Plus, putting a line through completed tasks will build feelings of success.
  5. Tear out old pages. Eventually, you’ll start to have pages where every task has been completed and crossed out.
  • It’s an amazing feeling to realize you’re getting things done every single day. Sure, some days you’ll get more done than other days, but still, you’re doing something to be proud of. Who would’ve thought you’d feel so confident, just tearing out a page from a spiral notebook?

A simple to-do list will bolster your confidence in many different ways. You’ll be proud that you planned ahead and followed through with your tasks. Plus, finishing each job and getting rid of a whole page of completed tasks will boost your confidence enormously.

Writing down what you want to accomplish in a day can be an integral part of an organized, effective and self-assured life. Start living today and every day with more optimism and confidence by making use of To-Do lists.

Choosing Your New Year’s Resolutions

At this time of year, you may be considering whether you’re going to make a New Year’s resolution. Maybe you’ve made them in the past and lost interest over time. Or perhaps you buckled down and followed through. Either way, you’re now facing the beginning of another new year.

Even if you’re less-than-thrilled with your follow-through in prior years, the new year brings amazing opportunities to challenge yourself in all kinds of ways.

Try these ideas to help you set up your resolutions so you’ll be successful during the coming year:

  1. Select an area of your life that’s important to you. One of the keys to choosing your New Year’s resolutions is selecting a goal that truly matters. Ideally, you can find something you want more than anything. This will help keep you dedicated.
  2. Be specific. The whole idea of making a New Year’s resolution can seem over-simplified. You’ll hear people say, “My New Year’s resolution is to get in to shape” or “I want to work less.”
    • What do statements like, “I want to spend more time with my family this coming year” really mean? Here’s how to be more specific:
      • For the resolution to get into shape, why not state it in more detail? Consider committing to specifics, such as, “I want to lose 2 inches from my waist and 3 inches from my hips.”
      • Another example of being more exacting might be “I want to increase visual muscle definition in my abdominals and my upper arms.”
  3. Make your resolution measurable. How will you measure your results?
    • For example, spending more time with your family may manifest as, “I plan to work 4 hours less per week in the coming year,” or “I won’t work on Saturdays, starting January 1st.”
  4. Structure your resolution using mini-goals. Consider cutting your overall goal into smaller, separate goals. Select the first mini-goal to accomplish in the process and designate it as your New Year’s resolution for the first 3 months.
    • Consider this example: You want to lose 30 pounds. You’ve struggled to drop the weight in the past. But you want to get serious now.
    • Here’s one way to cut this into mini-goals: Lose 10 pounds in the first 3 months of the year, lose another 10 pounds in the second quarter of the year and drop the final 10 pounds the third quarter of the year. The fourth quarter of the year, plan to focus on maintaining your weight loss.
  5. Be realistic. It might not be possible for you to accomplish everything you want in just one year. But you probably can be well on your way to your goal by the end of the year if your New Year’s resolution is within reasonable standards.

When selecting your New Year’s resolutions, focus on what matters to you. Be specific and make your resolutions measurable. Use mini-goals and be realistic in establishing whatever resolutions you select.

By addressing your resolution as a process rather than just a goal, you’re much more likely to succeed. And when you achieve one goal, you’re more apt to set resolutions and accomplish them in the years that follow. Start this year to make each year your best one ever!

Finding Your Life Purpose

Do you ever wonder why you’re here? After all, you were created with a unique set of passions and talents that no one else in the world can duplicate! Discovering your purpose in life lets you use your unique assortment of feelings and abilities to bring you greater self-fulfillment.

When you’re doing what you feel like you must have been born to do, you can create a life you enjoy through and through. Your goals will have more meaning to you and challenges will be naturally easier to overcome as you joyfully move toward achieving those goals.

This process for finding your life purpose enables you to tune in to your inner self and figure out what makes you tick. Take the time to find your purpose – your life will certainly change for the better!

Prepare Yourself

For this process, an open mind is optional, but helpful. It doesn’t matter if you don’t think this will work – it just means it might take a little longer. All you really must have are a piece of paper, something to write with, and approximately an hour of peace and quiet.

As you’re doing this exercise, try to empty your mind as much as possible. The clearer your mind is, the quicker and easier the process will be. Also, do this while you’re relaxed, alone, and unlikely to be disturbed.

The Process

1. Focus on your intention. Write at the top of your paper: “This is my life purpose.” This simple act sets your intention in your mind for the next hour.
2. Begin listing your thoughts – even doubts about this process. As you clear your mind and focus on this process, write whatever comes to mind, no matter what it is. If you think to yourself, “This isn’t going to work,” then you would write, “This isn’t going to work.”
3. Brainstorm. Answering these questions will get you started. Then keep writing your thoughts until you find your life purpose.

• What are your talents and abilities?
• Which talents would you like to develop further? Why?
• What are your passions?
• Do you get joy from helping others? Who?
• Have you always wanted to be a philanthropist?
• What activities do you enjoy?
• What have you always wanted to do, but you haven’t done it yet?
• Who do you most enjoy being around? Adults? Children? Why?
• Do you love animals?
• Do you like to travel?
• Do you want more excitement in your life?
• What are your favorite books or movies? Why?
• How do you feel about your relationships?
• Do you take an interest in politics or world matters?
• What is your most important priority in your life? Family? Work? Something else?

4. How will you know? You’ll just know. It will be the answer that fills you with the most emotion. You may even cry. The idea will resonate with you completely, and there won’t be any doubt. Just continue writing whatever comes into your mind until you reach that point.

• Commonly, answers will repeat themselves. A lot of unrelated nonsense is also likely to come out. Our brains can be a little cluttered, and this exercise will expose that fact. Don’t let anything you write distract you from your intentions; odd things quite frequently end up on the paper.

There will be several answers along the path that feel pretty good to you, but remember, you’re looking for the big one. When you see the ones that are good, but not “it,” this means you’re close, but not quite on target yet.

• You’re looking for that one idea that feels overwhelming to you. In this exercise, it’s common for your life purpose to reveal itself in less than 100 ideas, but it can take as many as 400. Keep writing.

How Can I Apply My Life Purpose to Benefit Me?

Now that you’ve discovered your purpose, always try to honor it. To do so, keep it in mind consistently. Ask yourself, “Is this in alignment with my ultimate purpose?” A life lived like this, with direction and intentionality, is a life you can truly enjoy.

 

So don’t wait any longer; schedule a time to do this when you know you’ll have some peace and quiet. Knowing the core reason you’re here is one of the greatest gifts you could ever give yourself.

Determining What Motivates You

Being able to figure out what motivates you will be a real benefit throughout your life. Once you know what brings you inspiration, you can draw from this list to keep you going whenever you need a boost.

Explore this process to discover your own motivations:

1. Think about the most difficult situation you’ve ever experienced. Then record the answers to these questions:

• What did you think about the event?
• How did you feel about it?
• How did you arrive at how you were going to handle and resolve the situation?
• What was important to you at the time – was it how you felt, what you thought your parents would think, what you believed was “the right thing to do” or something else?
• Ultimately, what did you do to resolve the event?

2. Next, reflect on 2 or 3 of your biggest achievements. Maybe for you, graduating from college or moving out on your own was a big achievement. Continue writing down your answers to these additional questions. This process will help you to identify your own motivations.

• What did you do to achieve your success

• How did you meet your goals?
• What did you think about during the process?
• What motivated you – looking out for your future, wanting to make more money, hoping to make your parents proud, or something else?
• Did you visualize what your life would be like once you had achieved your goal?
• How much did you really want to achieve it?

3. Analyze your answers. After reflecting on the above questions, your mind will be more open to identifying what’s important to you. So far, what have you discovered that motivates you? Are you surprised at what you’ve found?
4. How do you feel about these concepts? What motivates one person might not motivate another. Still, it’s likely that you’ll feel inspired by the same one or two issues consistently throughout your life.

Ideas from this list may ring true to your feelings:

• You strive to feel like you’re doing “the right thing.”
• You want to increase your ability to earn more money.
• Pursuing your passion propels you forward to accomplish more.
• You hope to see the pride in your parents’ eyes.
• Maybe you seek recognition from other people – you hope to be noticed and admired.
• You want to make your or your children’s futures better.
• You feel the need to prove to yourself that you can achieve something.
• You like the idea of stepping up to a challenge in your life.
• Seeking variety in life motivates you to try new things.
• You strive to overcome a difficult childhood and emerge triumphant.
• Discovering and validating who you really are as an individual is important to you.
• You plan to dispute negative messages someone from your past instilled in you.
• You want to do something in life that “really matters.”
• Perhaps you enjoy the sheer entertainment value of doing something.
• Writing down your goals and making an action plan spurs you on to accomplishment.
• You like to see your list of achievements grow.

Whether you want to improve your life, make more money, or follow your passion, discover what motivates you. Then, apply your motivators to situations that really matter. Now, you’re ready to achieve whatever you seek in life.