7 Ways to Get Unstuck

Everybody experiences rough patches in life. Perhaps you had a less-than-ideal childhood or endured challenging situations as an adult. If letting go of your past has been difficult, living in the present will bring more joy and fulfillment to your life and set you up for a brighter future.

Regardless of your past experiences, you have the ability to move forward and begin living in the present. Admittedly, this will require some time and effort, but you can practice any time you like.

Try these suggestions to inspire your desire to stay in the moment:

1. Accept the past. Whatever the situation that has you stuck, now’s the time to make peace with it. The event has already happened.

• Maybe it was something you couldn’t control. Perhaps you were a victim or survivor. Or maybe you made a mistake. How did the situation make you feel at the time? How do you feel about it now? Once your feelings are clear to you, you can move forward.

2. Recognize that your past doesn’t define you. We’ve all heard people who’ve experienced a challenging event say, “It’s made me who I am.” If taking that stance works for you and you can move on with your life, that’s great. If not, know that the situation doesn’t have to make you who you are.

• You have the power to define your own existence. From now on, you can be whomever you choose.

3. Let go. Allow thoughts and feelings about the situation to float away. Use visualization to imagine a large black balloon filled with the troublesome event. Let that situation and your feelings float away from your world.

4. Take a detailed look at your life. Do you live where you want to live? Are you doing the kind of work you want to do? Maybe you’ve spent enough time wishing, hoping and researching. On the other hand, maybe when you examine your existence, you’ll realize you already have all the elements of a great life.

5. Right now, start to create the life you want. If you’ve already got what you want, great! You’ll have less work to do. If you’re unsure, read on.

• We’ve all heard a story about how someone saved the good china to use for special occasions. Years passed, the china stayed in the cupboard, and guess what? The china wasn’t ever used. No occasion was ever gauged as “special” enough.

• Do you regard your life in the same way? Are you waiting for the future to come so you can live in the place of your dreams, pursue your beloved goals and take part in the activities you want to do? There’s no time like the present to live the life you want.

6. Immerse yourself in each moment. Regardless of the list of things you have to do, spend your moments fully engaged in whatever you’re doing right now. You’ve probably experienced the frustration and irritation of being involved in one activity while you’re actually thinking about another task or activity you need to complete.

• Make a special effort to focus on whatever’s going on at any given time. If you’re watching a movie, totally focus on the plot, scenes and characters. If you’re working on a project for work, screen out everything else and put your all into it.

7. Consciously connect with your emotions. Examine how you feel. Are you energized? Is your mood melancholy? How do you feel about what you’re doing right now? Increase awareness of your own emotions throughout the day as you go from task to task. Living in the present means living consciously.

When you live in the present, you’ll enjoy your life more. So wherever you are, be there in body, mind and soul.

When you allow yourself to feel however you do about an event, task or situation, you’re acknowledging to yourself you deserve the time to live your life to its fullest. Learning to live in the present will empower you to experience the fulfilling life you desire.

How To Build a Stronger Ego

In self-help literature, we often read about the benefits of diminishing or eliminating the ego. Many write as though the ideal existence involves giving away all their stuff and doing away with attachment to anything. If that’s truly your calling, then go for it!

But what if you want to just be a regular person and feel good about yourself? What if you want to have a rich and exciting life, whether or not you have material abundance? Is there a way?

Instead of associating ego with detrimental personal traits, you could associate a strong ego with strong character. With a developed ego, you learn to have a healthy sense of self. And a healthy sense of self helps you be a person of character.

You can also work this in reverse: act like a person of character and you’ll learn to have a healthy sense of self. In other words, you’ll develop your ego.

What Is Character?

How do you act like a person of character? Here are some attributes to start with. Maybe you can think of some more that you’d like to demonstrate in your everyday life.

  • Courage: The ability to move forward when uncertain or fearful. This gives you a lot more options than you have when you feel too timid or fearful to take action.
  • Charity: When you help others, you help yourself even more in the end.
  • Discipline: Asserting control over yourself and your daily habits will strengthen your ego.
  • Adventure: Explore the world and its abundance of offerings. By having a better understanding of the world, you’ll understand yourself and others better.
  • Honesty: People who act or speak dishonestly often do so because they’re trying to hide the truth about themselves. Be honest and upfront in all your dealings. 

Expanding Your Mind Strengthens Your Ego

In addition to practicing good character, expanding your mind contributes to a happy and full life, strengthens your ego, and gives you more opportunities to demonstrate your character.

Consider these ways to use your mind for your benefit:

  1. Evaluate your model of the world. How do you act in response to your model of the world? Can you reshape your actions to bring about more desired results?
  2. Create a social support system that best serves you. Humans are social animals. Our interpersonal interactions and our environment have a significant impact on us. Fortunately, to some extent we all get to choose those around us. Include people in your life that support your highest vision of yourself.
  3. Become more capable. The mind can take us all sorts of places, whether we want to go there or not. Ultimately, though, we can choose where we want to direct our mind. Use your innate intelligence to tell your mind where to direct attention. Choose your focus wisely and you can strengthen your character and lessen your fears.

While it is not possible to eliminate your ego, you can  strengthen your ego to have a more engaging life. By building your character and your intellect, you’ll be able to bravely push forward and create the life you and your loved ones deserve.