Building Strong Relationships

Strong relationshipsInvesting time and emotions in a relationship that ends up failing can be exhausting. At work or in your personal life the affects are the same. Time and energy are spent and heartache happens.

Relationships are part of being in a community. Being judged for relationships that we are involved in or that surround us is part of being in that important community. Should we step out of the community and give up on relationships altogether to avoid further pain? Of course not.

Good working relationships are a part of everyday business and your personal life. You want relationships in your life at least for networking and of course for fun. Relationships can vary, there are: family, managers, mentors, lovers, neighbors, acquaintances, employees, and many others in your life.

Here are a few tips to building strong relationships of all types:

Honesty – Be open and transparent. People appreciate it. It may seem risky but being real is the foundation of it all.

Apologies – If you are wrong – admit it. People respect that. Don’t be afraid to admit your mistakes – it only makes you look ridiculous. We are all human.

Communication – Keep in touch so that you are not out of touch. Be available – it is worth it.

Face time – Face-to-face visiting can never be replaced by anything other just that. Spend time together – the quality cannot be surpassed.

Old-fashioned writing vs. emails –  Don’t forget this format – you will be glad you didn’t. Emails are a wonderful way to say hello as well.

Compliment – Let people know you appreciate them and notice what they do – it will take the both of you a long way.

Interest – Really and genuinely care about the person you are in a relationship – do this by taking a keen interest in what they do, like, and enjoy.

Relationships are a wonderful part of life that you do not want to miss out on. Spend time doing a little research and exploration in how you can live out this part of your life – a little fuller – and you will be glad you did. The application of what you have learned is the fun part.

A Life of Intense Purpose

Hitting the bullseyeNot having focus in your life – a purpose or goal – does not serve you or others well. Aimless living creates frustration and keeps you from your true direction. This takes time and reflection. Spend time reflecting on what your hidden desires might be. Your passions matter in life – make sure what you do lines up with your true passions.

Finding Purpose

Most importantly – take note of what you love and don’t lose it. Letting go of your interests and/or passions can be detrimental. Knowing and understanding what drives you is so important. Use your gifts and talents in the best way possible and take note of how it energizes you.

Doing what you love or are passionate about is a way to re-charge your batteries. Make sure you focus on this area – we cannot live with dead batteries – we must recharge. Many people who are miserable have simply not found a way to recharge their batteries.

Surround all activities around your purpose

Find your purpose and then act on it. All that you do should be measured by how it supports your purpose or detracts from it. All actions need to be geared towards your purpose – everything you do can be fulfilling. If you find yourself doing a task that does not suit you well or drains you – make sure you stop that activity or delegate it to someone else.

Purpose in life can be to provide or to plan activities for loved ones. These are several examples of purposes in life:

Cooking - Creating and designing foods can greatly put you in touch with your creative and tactile traits – if cooking fuels you then delve in and cook. You are the boss; you prepare what you want with the ingredients and flavor combinations you choose. How you prepare the food directly relates to your family’s health and enjoyment as well.

Tidiness – Cleanliness is next to godliness – it makes you feel comfortable and happy. Washing clothes, cleaning surfaces, organizing your things, all make you feel connected and in control of your life. All you have to do is prepare and create the environment you choose. This affects health as well.

Movement – All movement moves you towards health. Encouraging your family and yourself to move and explore is one of the smartest things you can do. This creates a healthy mind and body. Having a healthy weight and outlook create a stronger family platform for your life and your family’s.

All of these activities are examples of things that add to your purpose in life. They support your purpose, drive, and goals. These things in balance do not detract from your purpose in life. Unlike laziness, over-eating, spending beyond your budget, and other negatives like these.

Negativity and doing things that do not build your purpose in life can be replaced with activities and choices that build you up. Make sure you are living out your purpose at your place of employment as well.

Planning or participating in social events can really affect your outlook and purpose at work. Being part of the bigger picture can help grow your interests at work. Start an activity group in order to plan for upcoming events and festivities at work.

Start living your purpose today. Live intensely, with passion, with purpose, with focus, and without things that hinder you and your goals. You will find renewed energy and passion for life and will be the best you can in your life. Go for it – it’s worth your time and investment. You are the best one to take care of you!

How to Live Anxiety Free

Anxiety freeAnxiety is something that can truly take over your entire life. Ultimately sickness can occur if we let stress and anxiety rule our lives. But no need to fret for there are natural ways to combat the feelings of stress and anxiety and below I share some with you.

Controlling Stress and Anxiety

First you need to understand what is controlling you that may be causing the stress and/or anxiety – what are the triggers? Can you control it or is it something you need to manage instead. You can overcome some stressors just by simply managing them. If you don’t like where you live or the kind of job you have – you can take steps to improve what you have or work to change the location or job. Taking control via steps of action is key.

Changing Your Health

One sure way you can change your situation is by changing your health. Some people do not think of it this way – but you can be in control of your health by taking control of your diet and exercise.

By categorizing and organizing your anxiety and stress – you can learn to manage and control this aspect of your life.

Here are some tips that may help:

Organize anxieties – Write down who or what triggers your anxiety. Write down ways that you can feel better when the anxiety first starts. You can have a plan of attack so-to-speak. Being prepared will help you mentally defend yourself.

Breathe well – Rapid breathing can enhance a  panic attack and hyper ventilate. Make sure you remember to breathe deeply and slowly to calm and relax yourself when you feel a stressful moment coming on.

Visualize a calm place – Take yourself to a happy place – a place that makes you relax… keeping in touch with what makes you happy and relaxed really helps this process. Imagine being in an ideal situation. Visualize yourself letting go of the stress and calming down.

Encourage yourself – Repeat a powerful and encouraging statement to yourself. Saying, “I am worthy of a new and fulfilling job, one where I am treated with respect and not abused”. This kind of statement can be very powerful to use when you are stressing out from work and anxiety seems to be ready to take over. You can create a statement for any situation. Reassuring yourself of positive things is very powerful for your mind and makes your mind very strong.

Grow healthy – Eating a healthy diet and exercising regularly will help you in finding your happy place.  A strong mind couples with a strong body. If you abuse your body by eating unhealthy, processed foods and drinking lots of alcohol/taking drugs – your body and mind will spiral downward.

Backup – Have someone to talk to that can support your efforts and encourage you. Letting friends and family help is a great and it will help strengthen your mind as well. Professional help is also available and there’s nothing wrong with using a professional counselor to help you.

Remember to take great care of yourself – you are the best and only person to do this. Taking care of your body and mind is always the best thing for you.

Relaxation Tips for Busy Parents

Busy ParentsParents can be busy, which of course is an understatement, especially if you have more than one child. One child may play a sport, another may play in the band, and another may be involved in scouting. Parents may feel like nothing more than a glorified cab driver. Although it may not be possible to remove all activities, below I share some tips for those rare moments you are not running around.

Read a book

How long has it been since you’ve curled up with a good book? Set aside time each day to do just that. Maybe you can’t physically get comfy in your favorite chair, but that doesn’t mean you can’t take time to read. If your children have you taxiing them all over the place, take along a book to read while you wait for them.  Now with the latest e-reader gadgets, you may actually be able to finish that book you started before your children were born.

Hire a Babysitter

Take some time out for you. Keep a list of trusted babysitters handy for those times you’re not busy. Call one of them up and ask them to keep the kids while you and your partner go out on the town.

Find a nice, quiet restaurant and promise not to talk about the children. While you’re at it, why not take in a movie you’d both like to see? Your children are already being cared for; you may as well take advantage of the time without them to truly enjoy yourselves.

Exercise together

Physical activity has been shown to reduce stress and it’s also good for the body. The great thing is that exercising also releases endorphins which help you relax and feel good, sometimes for hours after you’ve finished exercising. Another benefit of exercising together is that you can encourage each other when the going gets tough.

Take a mental vacation

Children daydream regularly, but it seems parents have forgotten this important activity. Take time to sit together and daydream. Talk about where you’d like to travel and about things you’d like to do while you’re there. Visualize your destination and let your minds wander. Before long you’ll feel relaxed and ready to tackle the rest of your day.

Listen to music

It’s been said that “music soothes the savage beast”. So when was the last time you listened to music to simply relax?Choose your favorite soft music, you know, the type that make your children cringe. These can be very relaxing when used during your mental vacation.

Busy parents are often found running their children from one activity to another as well as spending a good portion of their day at work. They may not have the luxury of taking time for themselves, but it’s important they do. Use one or more of these five relaxing ideas for busy parents to find ways to refresh and refocus on each other.  It is necessary for your well being and your relationship as well.

Avoiding Overwhelm

avoid overwhelmAvoiding the feelings of overwhelm is something that is not only necessary for our health but to our mental state of mind as well.  When we actively and consciously avoid those feelings we can ultimately avoid the burn-out feeling.  We all know what that feels like, exhaustion both mental and physical, short temper, sad, anxiety and sometimes depression.  Before we experience these feelings let’s look at some ways that we can avoid them all together.

  • If you sense the feelings of stress or anxiety coming on it is important to analyze what you do on a daily basis.  All too often we get up and go and don’t take time to truly focus and determine if we are doing too much.  Consider taking out a pad of paper and writing every detail of our day on this pad.  You will be truly amazed at what you do on a daily basis! If removing some items from your long list are impossible, then consider stretching out the tasks throughout the week.  Do you truly have to wash several loads, cook dinner, clean the floors, take your child to baseball all in the same day? Break down your tasks and you will automatically feel the sense of relief.
  • We as women, tend to believe that we can do everything on our own, which of course will lead to burnout.  It is perfectly acceptable to ask for help.  If you are married, ask your spouse to help with the daily activities.  If you have children, teach them tasks that will help you throughout the day and week.  Remember they are never too young to participate in family activities and that includes chores.  Ask a friend to help or simply be there to vent. Yes, it’s okay to vent!  Keeping all those feelings of overwhelm inside is not healthy.
  • Learn to incorporate breaks into your busy day.  It is important to take breaks to refresh your mind, and get the second wind which is needed to continue.  Take a nap or to rejuvenate yourself, consider going outside to inhale the fresh air.  Take a 10 to 15 minute walk and feel totally renewed.  It is important to simply step away from whatever situation or activity is causing you stress at the moment.  Once you take the necessary break, you will beat the burnout stage before it occurs.
  • Ultimately no one knows your body better than you!  Don’t ignore the signals that surface when your body or mind is feeling overwhelmed.  Headaches,  for example are not normal and are signals that your body gives you to signify that something is wrong and many times it’s because we have taken on too much.  Be careful and listen to your body.  Just as the oil light goes off in your car as a sign that it’s time for a maintenance check, your body will give you signals too.  Be aware of them and you will ward off the burnout stage and enjoy life to the fullest.

These are just a few tips that will help you stop the feeling of burnout in its tracks.  Begin implementing some of these tips today and you will enjoy getting up each day to a brand new day full of greatness.